Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Madonna’s Top Music Video Boy Toys


Did someone mention Tony Ward? Oh right, that was us. It’s a Monday morning, so we were thinking about him again, naturally. Was he ever hotter than in Madonna’s “Justify My Love” video?  Speaking of the Queen, it goes without saying that Madonna has made some of the best music videos in the last 30 years. From boyfriends to backup dancers, she has shared the video screen with some fine men. From “Burning Up to “Girl Gone Wild” we list Madonna’s top music video boy toys.

1.  ”Justify My Love”
Tony Ward is not only the hottest man ever to appear in a Madonna video, he’s one of the hottest men to ever walk the face of the earth! Now a fashion model icon, Tony Ward was a discovered when fetish-art photographer, Rick Castro saw his nude pictorial in the gay porn magazine In Touch and got him started in fashion modeling. Ward and Madonna were an item in the early 1990s and that’s Tony’s delicious jock-strapped butt Madonna is munching on in her Sex book. Tony also appeared in the Cherish and Erotica videos and has referred to Madonna as his, “mother/lover/teacher/friend/bitch/liar/goddess/student/ poetess/angel//broken-heart/inspiration/intrigue and human awe.” Gee, is that all?

2.   “Papa Don’t Preach”
“I answered the phone and a voice said, ‘Hi, this is Madonna. I would like you to be in my next video.”
Madonna spotted actor Alex McArthur in the indie film, Desert Hearts and knew she found her (video) baby daddy. One of the most iconic videos of the ’80s, “Papa Don’t Preach” ensured that Alex would indelibly be remembered as, “The one you warned me all about….”

3. ”Vogue”
“What are you lookin’ at?” All the hot guys, duh! Madonna invites the backup dancers from her legendary 1990 Blond Ambition Tour to join her for this equally legendary video, directed by David Fincher.  Madonna plays Truth or Dare with boy toys; Luis Camacho, Oliver Crumes, Salim Gauwloos, Jose Guitierez, Kevin Stea, Gabriel Trupin and Carlton Wilborn, as they introduce drag ball culture to middle America and the world.

4.  ”Borderline”
Madonna gives us the first glimpse of that infamous Boy Toy belt and snags singer/dancer Louie Louie to star as her Latin lover. Louie Louie would later try to capitalize on his Borderline fame and launch a musical career of his own.

5. “Secret”
Forgive us for being confused when Madge sings, ‘Happiness lies in your own hands” and we think the song is about masturbation. Turns out Madonna’s secret is milk-chocolate-model Jason Olive. Before popping up as Madonna’s secret lover, Jason appeared in tons of print ads for Calvin Klein.

6.  ”Open Your Heart”
Who’s that boy? Felix Howard was just 13 years old when he starred with a scantily clad Madonna in one of the best videos of the ’80s.  By sharing a kiss with Madonna, he simultaneously became the envy of all straight men and a teenage heartthrob to countless gay boys around the world who were mesmerized with his brooding, yet sensitive good looks.

7. “Express Yourself”
“What you need is a big strong hand.” And what big strong hands they are. Madonna’s Metropolis is chock full of soaking wet men but only one got the key to her bedroom, fashion model Cameron Alborzian. According to Cameron, Madonna took an off-camera liking to him and chased him around the set. He turned her down! What?

8.  ”Girl Gone Wild”
Her hair is blonder than ever but Madge goes back to her roots with some Vogue and Human Nature style dirty-dancing. Those guys in the super high stilettos are Ukrainian synthpop dance group, Kazaky. The other boys gone wild, are models Brad Alphonso, Jon Kortajarena, Rob Evans, Sean O’Pry and Simon Nessman. Everyone appears to be orally fixated in this video as apples, cigarettes and guns make their way into multiple mouths.

9.  ”Hung Up”
Just over two minutes into Madonna’s video for Hung Up, Daniel “Cloud” Campos shows up as the disco-dancing Asian waiter and I no longer needed dipping sauce for my egg role… if you know what I mean.
Although his Hung Up dancing scene lasts only 15 seconds, Madonna clearly took a liking to Cloud. He’s also featured in her “Sorry” and “Get Together videos and was a dancer in her “Re-invention” and “Confessions” Tours.  Break me off a piece of that fortune cookie!

10. Tie: “Take a Bow” and “You’ll See”
“Just stick it in!” appears to be the videos over-arching theme for Madonna’s longest chart-topping number one hit. Piercing pin pricks and impaled bull swords become metaphor as the plot sees Madonna playing neglected lover to real-life Spanish bullfighter Emilio Muñoz.
A sequel to “Take a Bow” finds Ms. Ciccone (fresh off the set from Evita and still wearing those Eva Peron costumes) being mistreated by her lover, played again by Spanish bullfighter, Emilio Muñoz. This time she walks out on him, leaving him behind in despair.

11. ”Burning Up”
Madonna’s first official music video features then boyfriend, Ken Compton personifying New York, new-wave coolness. His white suit and perfectly pouty lips make us wish Madonna had held onto him a little longer so he could have appeared in another video. I guess he wasn’t her “Lucky Star.”
12. ”Cherish”
If hunky mermen were known to rise out of the Pacific in threesomes of homoerotic splendor I think you would find a lot more people frolicking in the ocean near Malibu. The manly Merman included Madonna’s future paramour Tony Ward, and water polo players from Pepperdine University.

13.   ”Human Nature” 
Who didn’t want to cornrow their hair and squeeze into a black latex bodysuit after watching this video by ”Open Your Heart” and “Justify My Love”director Jean-Baptiste Mondino? Three delicious male dancers (including The Girly Show tour dancer, Luca Tommassini) manhandle Madonna as she’s tied down, strung up and turned out. “Absolutely no regrets!

14.  ”Like a Prayer” 
Actor Leon Robinson was hired to play a role inspired by Martin de Porres, the patron saint of mixed-race people and all those seeking interracial harmony. But this video featuring Madonna kissing a black saint, receiving stigmata, and dancing in front of burning crosses had most people saying, “Oh Jesus!”

15.   ”4 Minutes”
 It’s Justin Timberlake. Do I really need to elaborate?


16.  ”The Power of Goodbye”
Does anyone really think Madonna knows how to play chess? Who cares. Madonna teams up with Croatian actor and ER alum Goran Visnjic for a steamy game of checkmate.

17.  ”Beautiful Stranger”
You thought I was gonna say Mike Myers didn’t you? Um, no. Who are those two beautiful strangers dancing in the crowd; the ones with the bleach blond locks, piercings and tattoos? Kudos to director Brett Ratner for sticking them front and center as they enthusiastically sing along. They actually manage to steal focus from Madonna! Is it just me or does it look like they are so freakin’ pumped to be in a Madonna video they can barely contain themselves? Best music video extras ever!

18. ”Don’t Tell Me”
This video finds Madonna riding a mechanical bull. Now I ask you, why would you ride a machine when you’ve got four horse-hung cowboys dancing right next too. My advice? Ditch the bull and saddle up those backup dancers. Homo on the range.

19. “Bad Girl”
Actor Tomas Arana has the fascinating distinction of having gotten down with two of the biggest pop stars in history, Madonna and Whitney Houston.  In Bad Girl he’s the married co-worker who gets drinks and then gets busy with Madonna. In The Bodyguard he manhandles Whitney Houston before attempting to assassinate her at The Oscars.  Bad boy!

20. ”Deeper and Deeper”
Madonna plays a character based on Andy Warhol muse, Edie Sedgwick in the second video off theErotica album. Udo Kier (who also turns up in the Erotica video) makes for an unlikely sex symbol, but there is something undeniably striking about him. Check him out in the Warhol films Flesh for Frankenstein and Blood for Dracula. He also played a German john who has a 3-way with River Phoenix and Keanu Reeves in the gay classic, My Own Private Idaho.
Deeper and Deeper features cameos from dragtastic gay porn director, Chi Chi LaRue, iconic Warhol superstar Holly Woodlawn and 90’s gay porn king Joey Stefano playing hunk dejour and Warhol boy toy, Joe Dallesandro.

21.  Material Girl
Oscar-winner Keith Carradine (Nashville) impresses Madonna with daisies rather than diamonds in this Marilyn Monroe inspired video.
It was on the “Material Girl” set that Madonna met her future husband, Sean Penn. Apparently, gentlemen do prefer blondes.

Bonus: “Lucky Star”
It would be awkward (even by Madonna standards) to consider Madonna’s brother Christopher Ciccone as one of her boy toys. But, we need to give him a shout out all the same.  A backup dancer in the early years (along with Erika Belle) when Madonna was performing in New York dive bars, that’s Christopher dancing alongside big sis in her “Lucky Star” video.  His memoir, recounting the decades he spent living with, loving and touring with Madonna, is a must read.